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Making Positive Changes that Lead to Desired Results

Written by: Akua Hinds

August 19, 2015

Family dynamics

Wow!  July sure was an action packed month.  For me, I made some important and deep connections last month, and I was able to learn some important lessons.  On July 26th I watched Joel Osteen's service on television and the message he delivered made an impact on me.  Joel spoke about fatherhood and how important it is for men to embrace their roles as parents and be positive role models.  While I agree that fatherhood is an important task, I feel that motherhood is equally important. 

Many people talk about the "good old days" when there were more nuclear families, fewer divorces, and fewer blended families.  However, if one takes a closer look throughout history, you will see that there have always been challenges and issues in every household and relationship. Growing up in a nuclear family is not an automatic guarantee of receiving a successful upbringing.  Depending upon the biological parents, some children are actually better off being raised solely by one emotionally healthy and responsible parent instead of being raised by two parents where one of the parents is a negative influence on the family.  

Baby crawling and exploring

A negative influence cannot be ignored. The effects of a toxic person are felt throughout a person's life, especially a child who does not have the resources and legal freedom to escape a harmful situation.  When you release a drop of oil into a glass of pure water, the entire formula of the liquid is forever changed.  A toxic person's influence on an innocent child can forever change that child's perceptions.  That's not to say that a person cannot overcome unfair things that have happened to them, but it will require a lot of work. Promoting two parent households is not the answer if the parenting is mediocre; promoting a household run by two emotionally healthy, active, and committed parents should be the goal.  If that goal can't be achieved, a single parent home with one committed active and loving parent can be wonderful. 

For years now, I've been closely following a court case through the media that involves an American actress and her European ex-husband as they assert their custodial rights to raise their two young American-born children. The case is still ongoing, and time will tell who will be the winner in all of this; the mother, the father, or the children.  Although I have strong intuitive gifts, I can't predict what the final outcome of this entire scenario will be.  What I DO feel is that people, children especially, know intuitively who they should be spending more of their quality time with, and who we should be loving from a distance.  How we behave leaves a lasting legacy.  Positive ethics are when we do the right thing when no one else is watching us.  

Warmly, 

Akua Hinds

xoxo

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